Where'd That Week Go?

May 23rd Addendum

Hi there. Remember when I said

We milled about the house until the afternoon,

I kind of forgot something important. We earned one of our parenting badges that morning before my parents came over; We took our first unnecessary trip to the clinic with Grace. Now it wasn't the hospital, and we weren't even a little panicked, but I think we get our badge anyway.

We noticed that Grace's middle finger was red. It had been cut a few days earlier while trimming her nails, and infection isn't something you want to risk with a newborn. Additionally, Grace's belly button was periodically producing new dried blood, and the doctors had told us a few days earlier that if it happened one more time we should come in. So we called the advice nurse, and she surprised us by telling us that they had an opening at the clinic in 15 minutes (on a Sunday), if we were close enough. Since it takes 5 minutes for us to get to the clinic, we said sure and made our way there.

Grace is perfectly fine. Her finger is red because the too short nail became a hang nail and was pushing through the skin. Her belly is fine too. Not infected, she's probably just so good at stretching that she is re-opening her now well buried scab occasionally. We did get advice to soak her hand in water for 15 minutes three times a day, which led to this picture of Betsey looking like she's performing a high school practical joke on the wee lass.



May 24th & 25th

Memories from these days are already well faded. Suffice it to say, nothing of note must have happened, or there will be an addendum later. I really don't expect to have much to say about the week days unless Betsey tells me something interesting.

May 26th

The very early hours of the 26th were spent with a fussy baby, my baby, Grace. We tried just about everything until around 4 am, when I remembered to put Pandora on. She almost immediately quieted down and started to doze off. Amazing!

When I woke up, I decided I couldn't drive, so I stayed home.

Betsey had an eye appointment, but I wasn't needed because my amazing sis was willing to come watch Grace (the selfless sacrifice!). I slept while sis fed Grace, and Betsey went to the doc.

When I woke, I found a tired Betsey, who relayed a little tale about optometrist incompetence.

Betsey received a phone call as she was parking outside the office (3 minutes before her appointment), but she didn't hear it/see it/pick it up. When she got to the front desk, they said, "Oh we tried to call you."

Betsey looked at her phone. "Um, yeah 3 minutes ago."

"Well the doctor can't make it in today, so we have had to cancel appointments."

Betsey nicely explained their ineptitude to them. The inconvenience. The baby sitter. Still, it did little more than let a couple wisps of steam out of a pressure cooker. There was plenty of rage remaining inside her tired soul when I finally got to asking about the trip.

I took Grace and sent Betsey to bed.

Later in the day, Aunt Chrys came back over and visited for a bit. We made fun of D&D players while admitting that if we ever went so far as to make our own characters, we'd become entirely addicted.

I got good sleep that night because I had to.

May 27th

The alarm went off at 4 am. Time for work. To get my full 8 hours in and still get to leave at 3 to go sailing, I needed to be at work by 6. It was to be my triumphant return.

The previous night we'd had a little talk about sharing more of the load. I have still been finding time for video games, soccer, and now sailing, but my dear has basically only three states: Sleep - Feed - Thesis. The inequity in a partnership that's always been about being full equals was glaring. With commitments made, this was to be my single appearance for another two weeks before trying again, and in the mean time, no more video games, but I'm keeping my soccer. I'm a little disappointed that I didn't recognize the imbalance myself, but when things are the way you want them, you rarely take the time for introspection.

So I went sailing, and I had fun, and it's a good thing it wasn't my triumphant return because we lost, and we lost bad. Being on the boat again, though, was fantastic, and I'm hoping so very much that Grace will get easier, and my weekly sailing will not put any more ripples on the placid lake of our relationship.

When I got home, it was time to introduce Grace to her first water sport, bathing. She was not impressed.



After the girl calmed down, I took charge and sent Betsey to sleep. After all my play time, I was determined to give her a good night sleep.

May 28th

Slept she did. Betsey woke me after 7 and a half hours. I had managed a still impressive nearly 6, with only one feeding in the middle to break it up. A good night for all. Grace tends to sleep much better when we co-sleep with her, and I give co-sleeping all the credit for that night. We'd managed to pull that off on the couch, unintentionally for the first three hours, and then purposely for the last 2 and a bit.



Co-sleeping is a bit scary for a lot of parents. I have always been pretty comfortable with it; Betsey less so, but she was the first to end up doing it. When you mention co-sleeping, some people will look at you like your risking your child's life, like you're a bad parent. I really hope that's not the case, that I'm a bad parent in any person's eyes. In a world (or is it just in an America) full of snap-judgments and seemingly less tolerance for opposing views, I suppose I should just get use to it now before some jerk makes me feel bad because the new stroller doesn't have much in the way of shade. I know I'm being a good parent. I know what feels right. I can tell what makes my girl happy, secure, and peaceful. She's every day more and more my world, and I'm keeping her right here, next to me, as long as she'll let me.